Musical Comedy Albums

[Pina]

Ok, I know they're not for everyone, as most of them are

but I think some of them are hilarious!

One of my favourites is Joe Pesci's "Vincent LaGuardia Gambini Sings Just For You". Joe Pesci does the whole album as his character on My Cousin Vinny. He's really good. In fact, I heard he was a lounge singer before he became an actor.



Here is one of the songs on the album. I love it! ;D

TAKE YOUR LOVE AND SHOVE IT
Joe Pesci

Why don’t you take your love and shove it up your big fat ass
You know you’re the reason we’re through
I’m tired of all the yelling and the fights that we had
Eh they’re all because of you
Eh you moan and you groan and you bitch and you whine
You make every beef we got last
Well I’m telling you baby I’m through with you
Take your love and shove it up your big fat ass
Eh I’m better off being all by myself like fuckin’ Celine Dijon

I take you out for dinner and a dance and a show
You hate all the people and food
I’m happy and laughing I’m fun all the time
You’re always in a bad mood
I always look forward I never look back
But you bitch you dwell in the past
So I’m telling you baby I’m through with you
Take your love, shove it up your fuckin’ ass!

Why don’t you take your love, shove it up your ass
You know you’re the reason we’re through
I’m tired of all the yelling and the fights we had
They’re all because of you
You moan and you groan and you bitch all the time
You make every beef we got last
I’m telling you I’m through with you
Stick it up your big fat ass!

You thought you had charm, you thought you had class
You ain’t nothing but a big fat ass
Take your love, shove it up your big fat ass!

;D ;D ;D ;D

[Pina]

There's also the Tenacious D album! Tenacious D are Jack Black and Kyle Gass... Jack Black is best known for starring in the movie School of Rock. Dave Grohl also collaborates on some of the songs. In between the songs, there are comedy routine snippets, like the one I posted here (message #49): mellon.proboards4.com/index.cgi?board=Books&action=display&n=1&thread=623&start=45

I won't post the really naughty lyrics cuz Jana will kick my arse... ;D but I'll post these.

Tribute
Tenacious D

[Spoken]
This is the greatest and best song in the world... Tribute.

Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here,
we was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road.
All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon... in the middle... of the road.
And he said:
[Sung]
"Play the best song in the world, or I'll eat your soul." (soul)
[Spoken]
Well me and Kyle, we looked at each other,
and we each said... "Okay."
[Sung]
And we played the first thing that came to our heads,
Just so happened to be,
The Best Song in the World, it was The Best Song in the World.

Look into my eyes and it's easy to see
One and one make two, two and one make three,
It was destiny.
Once every hundred-thousand years or so,
When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow
And the grass doth grow...

Needless to say, the beast was stunned.
Whip-crack went his Whoopy tail,
And the beast was done.
He asked us: "(snort) Be you angels?"
And we said, "Nay. We are but men."
Rock!
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!

This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no.
This is just a tribute.
Couldn't remember The Greatest Song in the World, no, no.
This is a tribute, oh, to The Greatest Song in the World,
All right! It was The Greatest Song in the World,
All right! It was the best muthafuckin' song the greatest song in the world.
[2-part skat]
[Spoken]
And the peculiar thing is this my friends:
the song we sang on that fateful night it didn't actually sound
anything like this song.
[Sung]
This is just a tribute! You gotta believe me!
And I wish you were there! Just a matter of opinion.
Ah, fuck! Good God, God lovin',
So surprised to find you can't stop it.
[Skat]
All right! All right!

This one's really funny too! I wonder what Ronnie thinks of this? ;D

Dio
Tenacious D

Dio has rocked for a long, long time,
Now it's time for him to pass the torch.
He has songs of wildebeests and angels,
He has soared on the wings of a demon.

It's time to pass the torch,
You're too old to rock, no more rockin' for you.
We're takin' you to a home,
But we will sing a song about you.

And we will make sure that you're very well taken care of.
You'll tell us secrets that you've learned. Raow!
Your sauce will mix with ours,
And we'll make a good goulash baby.
Dio, time to go!
You must give your cape and scepter to me.
And a smaller one for KG.
Go! Go! Dio! Dio!

;D ;D ;D

www.tenaciousd.com

[Pina]

Technically, this doesn't classify as a musical comedy album, but the Barenaked Ladies' first album "Gordon" has some very funny and clever lyrics. In 1997, I met lead singers Steven Page and Ed Robertson and sat at their table when they attended the luncheon that the charity I worked for hosted. I always regretted not taking photos. I had my camera with me but I was too shy to ask... and besides I was about 7 months pregnant and was afraid my huge belly would overshadow the guys! ;D This was just before they hit it big in the States with the album "Stunt". Their subsequent albums are less "comedic", as they have proven themselves to be not only a novelty act. Here are some snippets of their funniest lyrics:

Be My Yoko Ono

...

You can be my Yoko Ono
You can follow me wherever I go
Be my, be my,
Be my Yoko Ono.
...

Oh no, here we go, our life is just one big pun.
Oh no, here we go as Yoko sings
Aieee!
...

I know that when I say this,
I may be stepping on pins and needles;
But I don't like all these people
slagging her for breaking up the Beatles.
(Don't blame it on Yokey)
if I was John and you were Yoko,
I would gladly give up musical genius,
just to have you as my very own, personal Venus.

Grade 9

I found my locker and I found my classes
Lost my lunch and I broke my glasses,
That guy is huge! That girl is wailin'!
First day of school and I'm already failing.

This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine

I've got a blue-and-red Adidas bag and a humongous binder,
I'm trying my best not to look like a minor niner.
I went out for the football team to prove that I'm a man;
I guess I shouldn't tell them that I like Duran Duran.

...

Well, half my friends are crazy and the others are depressed
and none of them can help me study for my math test.
I got into the classroom and my knowledge was gone;
I guess I should've studied instead of watching Wrath Of Khan.

...

They called me chicken legs, they called me four-eyes
they called me fatso, they called me buckwheat,
they called me Eddie

...

I've got a red leather tie and pair of rugger pants,
I put them on and I went to the high school dance.
Dad said I had to be home by eleven -
aw, man, I'm gonna miss Stairway to Heaven.

Brian Wilson

...

I had a dream that I was three hundred pounds
and though I was very heavy,
I floated 'til I couldn't see the ground
I floated 'til I couldn't see the ground
Somebody help me, I couldn't see the ground
Somebody help me, I couldn't see the ground
Somebody help me because I'm

Lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did
Well I'm lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did.

If I Had a Million Dollars

...

If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you an exotic pet (Like a llama or an emu)
If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (All them crazy elephant bones)
If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love

If I Had $1000000
We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I Had $1000000
We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
If I Had $1000000
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner.
(But we would eat Kraft Dinner. Of course we would, we'd just eat more. And buy really expensive ketchup with it. That's right, all the fanciest Dijon Ketchup. Mmmmmm.)

...


;D ;D ;D

[Paulo]

Before Spinal Tap, before Bill & Ted, before Air Heads, before the Darkness there was only BAD NEWS



l to r: Colin Grigson (bass guitar), Den Dennis (ryhthm guitar), Vim Fuego (lead guitar & vocals), Spider Webb (drums)





The best of British Heavy Metal (Not!) bands in the 1980's. ;D

[mary]

OMG! who are they Paulo??

I wanted to post all the lyrics of the Rocky Horror...but i think I won't stop to speak about it!

[Pina]

Thanks for introducing me to Bad News, Paulo. We listened to the CD in the car on the way back from Stonehenge/Bath. I never laughed so hard in my life!

There's a great review here: emma.farrer.users.btopenworld.com/badnews.htm

This song is hilarious! ;D

Drink Til I Die

Give me another drink Mr. Bartender
If you don't I'm gonna stick yer dick in a blender
Coz I, oh I, I'm gonna drink til I die
I'm gonna drink til I die

All I want to do is drink as much as I can
That's why I'm a member of a heavy metal band
Coz I, oh I, I'm gonna drink til I die

Lager makes me happy, vodka makes me mean
I'm a heavy metal drinking driving alcohol machine
Listen to me drinking, drinky, drinky, drink.
Listen to me when I go Bleuuuuuuugh!

I get up in the morning, drink a bottle of gin
40 pints of lager and a babycham
Coz I, oh I, I'm gonna drink til I die
I'm gonna drink til I die

And there's a really twisted version of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody on the album! ;D

You can hear some tracks here:

www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0000032RP/qid=1095343986/sr=ka-1/ref=pd_ka_1/104-0224703-5283925

ENJOY!! ;D ;D ;D